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non-haiku poetry
my cute little birdy
last week i bought a birdy,
the cutest little thing.
i feed him fruits and seeds:
a feast fit for a king!
but when i invited my sister over,
my birdy went and bit her;
so i pulled off his wings, and chopped off his head,
and flushed the bastard down the shitter.
my unusual adventure
i went to a strip-club
to get a jolly show;
i don't do this stuff often,
it was my first time, you know.
everything was going well
'til the final act came on;
i was quite surprised to see
it was my uncle john.
christmas
my cousin bob loves christmas,
he loves it more than me.
there's family traditions
which he follows religiously.
like leaving santa cookies
and a big ol' glass of milk,
or hanging on the fireplace
his stocking made of silk.
but the tradition he takes most seriously,
(more than any other)
is getting drunk, dropping his pants
and beating up his mother.
the meaning of life
what was god's intention
when he created man?
are we here for a purpose;
part of a higher plan?
what is our objective
to accomplish in this life?
is it reproductory?
to get a pretty wife?
or maybe academic...
is reading books the answer?
it may well be artistic -
should i become a dancer?
or is it military?
to get the highest rank?
actually, sod this shite -
i'm off for a wank.